Make Love not Spam

We all hate spam, even when it's funny spam (see my other web blog). But now Lycos have decided to attack the web sites that generate spam - They have created a screen saver that [when switched on] sends continuous requests to the spammers web-site to cause them to have large bandwidth bills at the end of the month.

Instead of actually shutting the sites down by bombarding them (this doesn't cost them money), the software makes sure that the web sites stay 'alive' but run up massive bandwidth bills.

Download the screen saver now (only if you have an unlimited broadband account though!) from:

http://makelovenotspam.com/intl/

Still Haven't got a job....

I'm still unemployed (it's been five weeks now). I'm beginning to get a bit depressed with it all now. I don't like working, but it's impossible to live in this world (and especially this city) without money. It's not as if I can enjoy my time off either, I can't really afford to go out and enjoy myself and everyone I know is working during the day (apart from Mikey B [flatmate] who is also 'between jobs').

I have an interview on Monday that I don't have the relevant experience for. All I can do is hope that if I read enough about them that I can try and blag it somehow. I'm getting to the point now where I will have to simply take the next job I'm offered - no matter how shit it is or how little it pays!

Anyway...In my boredom the other day, I drew some sketches on my phone...

The "Nanny State"

I've just read an article on BBC news about the banning of a poster advertising a new computer game (Vietcong, Purple Haze). The poster apparently included the words "Napalm never smelt this good".

The words were not even used as a 'tag line', they were a quote from a magazine that had reviewed the game and was obviously a reference to apocalypse Now. Apparently, six people (yes, six!) complained about the advert, and the Advertising Standards Agency decided this was enough to have the advert banned. They are the same people who earlier this month banned the Tango advert (the one with the guy rolling down the hill in a rolled up carpet).

This country has a population of roughly 59.6 million people (National office of Statistics, 2003). Not all those people will have seen the video game poster - I saw it and I use the tube in London every day. If we assume that all the complaints against this advert came from within London and were from people who use the tube (for arguments sake) then these six people make up about 0.0002% of all the people who could have seen the advert in a day (3 million passenger journeys are made each day on the underground). Even if we up this number to 1%, then that still means that 99% of tube users found the advert inoffensive. This country may be a democracy, and we do support the views of the minority, but come on....Let's be realistic about this!

I have been trying to find some links to web sites showing banned adverts, but I can't find one...Yet.

Back the bid - London 2012. (Can't think of a title)

Britain used to be a place where innovation was promoted, where new ideas were cheered. Britain used to rule the world, when Britain did something, the world took notice and followed suit.

But now? When was the last time Britain actually did something? We have a government that tells us all the time how they will change things, but what have they changed? Some minor reforms to the health service? What about changes that we, the public, can see? Fox hunting? How long has that bloody taken? Smoking in public? If the Irish can do it, then surely we can. Our government is afraid of change…sooner or later our country is going to be left behind. We are supposed to be one of the top five economies in the world, but we don't deserve that status.

We can't even make our minds up about the Olympic games! The way I see it, the Olympic games are an excuse for an almighty party in London - which is the only excuse we need! Can we afford it? Yes, we are one of the top five economies in the world - remember?

Why doesn't our government do something gutsy for a change - why not ban smoking in public places (don't talk to me about fucking civil liberties, any smoker who brings that argument up doesn't have the intelligence to be arguing in the first place!!).

Course.... I'm not saying the British people are any better. We have become so content with being content that we don't want change. When our country tries to do something interesting (like the millennium dome or the Olympics) we have a media who slag it off and a people who sit at home and grumble about it.

"Long time no hear"

Apparently I haven't been 'blogging' much recently. Well, I haven't. It's not like I don't have any spare time (yes, I'm still unemployed), it's just that I don't have anything to blog about!

I'm not going to sink to the lows of one suggestion to talk about the transsexual Liberal Democrats prospective candidate for Tooting. What she/he/it decides to do with their life is up to them (I'm a broad-minded kind of chap, I once watched queer as folk! (bit crap, full of gays)).

Another suggestion (by the same person) was to talk about "I'm a celebrity…". OK…so here goes..

It's shit, don't watch it!

(The bit about gays was a joke by the way, I've never watched queer as folk!!)

"I consider, this is what you call for"

I've started receiving a lot of spam recently (had managed to avoid it for a while but it soon catches up with you). Now I hate spam (obviously) and I don't see how anyone responds to them - especially judging by what I've been receiving lately. Below are copies of two e-mails I have been sent recently....Anyone know what they're talking about?

E-mail 1:
Subject: I Consider, this is what you call for
Text:
This pills is a full elemental grass tablets comprising a motley of herbs known for advancing intimate longing with execution. By exploitation my pills you should see an increase in sexual longing, a bettermentin your volume and discharge, too as increased powerand delectation during intimate activeness.

E-Mail 2:
Subject: You can transmute to the unexcelled human for your girl.
Text:
My tablets is used to remedy cavernous dysfunction, likewise renowned as an inability to copulate. This is in case a man can't procure, or retain, a stony tumid phallus appropriate for sexual action.This remedy is :

• suitable to be used as a discharge foil
• has key vantage over other specific
• can act for 4 days
• can erect up in the physical structure

hmmm..

"Picture of a fox taking a shit"

Someone used this phrase as a search in google and found my site - amazing! (Up until now, these words were not actually on my site as a sentence, but now they are. From this day forward, anyone searching for the above [why???] will find my site!)

I have decided not to degrade my site by actually showing a picture of a fox taking a shit, instead here is a picture of a horse taking a shit (Have you any idea how hard it is to take a picture of a fox...let alone one taking a shit!)

Actually....Can't find a picture of a horse taking a shit either! Here's one of me taking a sh...as if I would do that to you!

"Cabin bag with wheels" (Wankers!)

London is a big place, but I think it still has some kind of a sense of community. This is mainly driven by the Metro newspaper (the free morning paper that is available in tube stops). Basically people get to rant about things in the letters pages and any interesting thing happening in London or to Londoners will normally appear in its pages sooner or later. For example, anything that Londoners hate or anything they particularly like will be mentioned in the people at some point.

But I want to mention something that I don't think has had a mention yet, although I think it's only a matter of time. Basically, I'm getting more and more pissed off with people (mainly women) who pull those shitty little cases behind them (they stop at the top of the stairs, collapse the handle, carry it down the stairs, stop, expand the handle, pull behind them, stop at the top of the stairs etc etc). When you're on the tube (or more importantly, changing lines) there is quite often a lot of people around. Walking amongst these people is hard enough most of the time, let alone with having to look at the floor every two minutes to make sure you're not going to fall over one of these little things. Now, I know that people in London like to think of themselves as 'jet setters' but I seriously doubt this many people actually travel all of the time - if they do, who the hell is actually working in London!

(I'll be trying to get a picture of someone doing this over the next few days, but don't hold your breath!)

I blame Samsonite, shitheads!

Have no idea what I'm talking about...see here:

• Ebags version
• Argos version (ahh, good old Argos!)
• And, obviously, Samsonite have a whole raft of them here!