On my way to work this morning I was thinking...

Why is this apple so soft, soft apples are shit. Why, If I can buy orange juice made from concentrate, can't I buy concentrate and make lots of my own orange juice. Is that girl attractive. No, she's old, what was I thinking. Doesn't Christina Aguilera look good in that poster and why didn't I notice this tea stain on my shirt before I left the house?!

£3,500.00 for a house!!

What the fu....

An actual house for £3,500.00. Just imagine how shit it must be. I could buy that on my credit card!

http://www.findaproperty.co.uk/agent.aspx?agentid=1591&opt=prop&pid=237616

or...see pdf copy when that link goes...

Those bank holiday blues....

Every time I get back from a bank holiday away I really have a shit time of it at work. I know that everyone else is the same, but that doesn't make it any better.

Walking around the office like just another clone. Everyone wears the same clothes, although obviously some people can afford to pay more for their shirts/suits than others! Everyone packs into the over-priced cafeteria to buy reprocessed, over packaged, additive filled junk. And we think we like it? It's bollocks. The lot of it.

Why is there no money in being a bum.

Is it wrong to be jealous of "Big Issue" sellers?

"Buy the big issue...Stories amuse you, puzzles to confuse you"
(As said by the great big Issue seller in Euston Station).

Creuddyn Class of 2004...

When I went to this school I'm sure it wasn't this bad!

Look at this group of reprobates. Something tells me the next time these guys wear those suits they'll be attending a court hearing!

I am a believer

I've always considered myself an atheist, but that may all have to change now that I have been introduced to the "Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster".

http://www.venganza.org/

Home sweet home.

Life slows down when you enter wales. Not because the people are more laid back or because the pace is slower.

It's because the trains are Shit, the roads are Shit and the large majority of chavs here make the hours drag by.

I would much rather watch paint dry than listen to the conversations of the people on the arriva trains wales service from Crewe to Holyhead!

The magazines of choice on this train are hello and nuts (or is it nutz?).

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Originally sent via mobile phone, edited on-line to clear up crappy predictive text mistakes!

I really quite like this picture...

This phone really is great...

BASTARD!!!

Some bastard has stolen my stapler!! What is the world coming to!!

I do hope some 'comedian' of a work colleague hasn't hidden it for a "joke". It's not funny, not funny at all.

Here's a picture of it before I lost it (I knew this picture would come in handy one day!)

Watch Out google...

Watch Out google…
Does anyone else think that google could go a bit far? They have now moved into the instant messaging games (competing with Yahoo/MSN ICQ[are they still around] etc). They seem to be trying their had at everything internet related. It wouldn’t surprise me if they soon released their own browser (maybe buying the Firefox technology from Mozilla).
     When I first started using google, it was the “knowing man’s search engine”. Most people at the time used Altavista or Yahoo and people who knew about the internet used google. Now everyone uses it (and I even use it desktop search, it’s browser toolbar and am writing this blog using google’s blogger service).

But will they grow too big? Will they do an Apple? Apple used to be the niche computer company, making cool stuff for people in ‘the know’. Now it does all sorts and is starting to se a backlash from technical people in the iPod market. Maybe people see Apple as a ‘good guy’ when compared to Microsoft. This will start to change when people realise that Apple is even worse than Microsoft when it comes to restricting access to its source and allowing other companies to use its technology – itunes and ipod being a prime example!

Bored now. Ate a KFC last night. Was Shit. I hate fast food.

A word...

...that neither I or my phone's predictive text can spell:

Ninkanpoop (spelt phonetically of course).

Suggestions on the back of a post card please - or more usefully, suggestions in the comments section below...

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>>Sent via mobile phone<<

Why on earth...

...do women insist on wearing those crappy wrap around sun-glasses (The really big ones that take up half their face)?! They look fucking awful! Do women really think they look good in them? Jesus. Is it to avoid the damaging effects of UV rays? I seriously doubt it!

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>>Sent via mobile phone<<

New Photo Page...

In addition to the photo page on my web site I have decided to create a flickr photo page for all of the shots taken with my camera phone - Most are probably rubbish, but it saves me posting them to here and is quicker than adding them to the main 'pictures' page.

You can see these photos here (they will be of various London sights and whatever I see as I walk around)...

http://www.flickr.com/photos/bathers/sets/799706/

I really am a perv...

The south bank is full of people today (the sun is out for a change) and Ive just followed a stunning girl along the river (not like that!). Its funny watching both the women and men give her attention...obviously thinking very different things of course. The looks of hate she was getting from the girls, wow.

She was bloody wearing a corset though (and boots and a pleated skirt if you must know!)

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>>Sent via mobile phone<<

Edit > Was hoping to post a pic of the above, but a pic of the river will have to do instead..

Yes, I'm bored today...

A picture of Gaz Shaw doing an impression of Robert De Niro playing a gangster (not that he can play anything else really!)

Genius...

Police chief calls for £7 pint http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/4147058.stm

Such an intelligent man.

To solve the problem of binge drinking..Putt the price of a beer up to £7 !?!

Knob. The problem with binge drinking is not down to price, it's down to culture. People in Britain don't go for "a night out" they go to "get pissed" - Change this and you get rid of the problem (and no, I don't know how to change things..but there are more intelligent people than me out there that probably do).

But, for starters, how about changing these things:
- Why play loud music in pubs late at night - If we can't talk, we must drink
- Why do pubs / bars have less tables in the evenings - not just to get more people in, but to stop us from putting our drinks down.
- Why do many bars not have any flat surfaces - stops us from putting our drinks down!
- Many pubs don't sell snack foods (Spanish bars give this stuff away for free). And not just peanuts (these contain salt and make you drink more) but why not stuff that can absorb the drink

I actually think that later closing times and *cheaper* drinks could actually make people drink less if managed properly - Without the dreaded 11:00 serving deadline, people won't feel the need to drink so much so quickly (people will get just as tired as they usually do) and with cheaper drinks people may actually choose to drink things that are weaker (men drink strong lager because it's cheaper than drinking tastier, weaker drinks). And this means reducing the prices of soft drinks also - One of the main reasons I don't drink soft drinks in pubs is that they cost the same (if not more) than the price of a beer!!

And anyway...how bloodembarrassingng is London when you bring people here? Last orders: 11 o clock? Shit, fucking shit. That's what it is.

I imagine the government will probably bow down to 'public pressure' (a small numbeChristianan do gooders who have nothing better to do) and abandon plan to extend the licensing hours. If they do, I think it could be the last straw for me...Yes, I love this city, but this country is shit.

Welcome to www.bathers.xxx

"More than 10% of all online traffic and 25% of all global net searches are for adult content, according to the ICM Registry."

Bullshit! Take out people working and this figure must be more like 95%?!

"But some are concerned that it would encourage more porn on the net."

Bring it on!!

"The Department of Commerce has received nearly 6,000 letters and e-mails from individuals expressing concern about the impact of pornography on families and children," said Mr Michael Gallagher, assistant secretary at the US Commerce Department, in a letter.

Big surprise...It's those right wing Christian fools over the pond at it again! What kind of impact does pornography have on kids..not to mention families? Apart from depriving teenage boys from much needed sunlight and giving dads something other than a mistress to please himself with...What damage can porn do?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/4155568.stm

Shit!!

Went for a jog this morning in preparation for the half marathon I'm running in less than two months time.

A Half marathon is 13 miles long...My jog this morning was, well...Nothing (see map below...Blue line to right marks the route).

To put it mildly, the jog did not go well. I felt awful about 30 seconds in to it..And it didn't get any better. I was jogging for no more than 20 minutes but it took me another 20 minutes just to recover! This half marathon could kill me...Watch this space!

Mass produced Meat (not animals)

I really don't know what to think of this. It seems to answer the problem of wanting to a vegetarian but also wanting to eat meat...but it does seem a bit horrible.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/4148164.stm

Still, quite amazing though!

And why...

Has my internet connection suddenly started to slow down this weekend?

Come on Freedom to Surf...Don't mess me about. I'm paying for a service and I expect to receive it...I know you want me on your 8 meg service...But I'm not paying £15 just to get what new customers are getting as standard!

Exisiting customers get shafted by all companies in this country. It really isn't fair. While on the subject - Vodafone: Sort your shit out!!

Lost (in adverts)

Im writing this during one of the many fucking advert breaks that channel four have decided to litter this new show with. Yes, it may be ok to have this many adverts in the states... But this is britain... Its normal practise here to at least get hid of some of the breaks! And why all the bloody E4 adverts? We're already watching the bloody channel! This may be enough to put me off watching this stuff!

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>>Sent via mobile phone<<

Google Earth - F#cking Amazing!

Yes, I like Maps, and yes, I like GIS (Geographical Infortmaion systems)....so this is bloody amazing!!

Check it out (fast internet connections only)

http://earth.google.com/

screenshot >>

Don't ever look at this site

Horrible stuff. My hands are sweating jus from watching this shit.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com

Whatever you do, don't go to the extreme video section.

Fucking Amazing...

And to think this kind of advert will soon be banned in the UK...

http://www.bigad.com.au/

Knobheads....

Just bloody apply. How can people who run businesses be so bloody un-business savvy!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/4747517.stm

Nothing ever happens

Anyone that knows me and has been pissd with me will know that I get really annoyed about the way 'nothing ever seems to happen' in this world. People never step back and look at their lives and realise they are shit.

Although it looks like 'Del Amitri' did...great song, great lyrics:

Del Amitri - Nothing Ever Happens

Post office clerks put up signs saying position closed
And secretaries turn off typewriters and put on their coats
Janitors padlock the gates
For security guards to patrol
And bachelors phone up their friends for a drink
While the married ones turn on a chat show

And they’ll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

Gentlemen time please, you know we can’t serve anymore
Now the traffic lights change to stop, when there’s nothing to go
And by five o’clock everything’s dead
And every third car is a cab
And ignorant people sleep in their beds
Like the doped white mice in the college lab

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all
The needle returns to the start of the song
And we all sing along like before

And we’ll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

Telephone exchanges click while there’s nobody there
The martians could land in the carpark and no one would care
Close-circuit cameras in department stores shoot the same video every day
And the stars of these films neither die nor get killed
Just survive constant action replay

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all
The needle returns to the start of the song
And we all sing along like before

And we’ll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

Bill hoardings advertise products that nobody needs
While angry from manchester writes to complain about
All the repeats on t.v.
And computer terminals report some gains
On the values of copper and tin
While american businessmen snap up van goghs
For the price of a hospital wing

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all
The needle returns to the start of the song
And we all sing along like before
Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all
They’ll burn down the synagogues at six o’clock
And we’ll all go along like before